Adjusting To Two


I had all these visions of how life with two children would be, the way we would adjust and what we would do as a family. I really wanted to venture out while Sam was on paternity leave, and do something as a family of four. After days, weeks and months of being stuck indoors unable to go out due to the horrible sickness I was suffering with during pregnancy- It's safe to say that I'm sick of the sight of our four walls. The truth is none of that has happened.



Isabelle is almost two weeks old now, and we have hardly been out, well do trips to do the food shop even count as going out? So far, Isabelle has got over jaundice, fort off a cold which she caught from her big sister, and now she's currently fighting an infection. Her umbilical cord took far too long to fall off, it came off on day 12, and due to the fact, the midwife left quite a lot attached it took ages to dry out. Now she has a little infection which has to be treated with an antibiotic cream. She really isn't having it easy, and neither am I to be really honest. I have an infection in my stitches, and I still haven't felt right since I gave birth.

On the upside, we have hardly seen anyone - I know that must sound strange, but one of the things that really worried me was how I would bond with Isabelle. I really struggled to bond with Emily, and I felt really smothered by having a constant stream of visitors. This time we have limited it to just having one or two a day, it has been easier for me, and also on Emily. Although most days we haven't had any visitors. It has given Emily the chance to really bond with her sister, and it has been so lovely to watch them together. Emily is absolutely besotted with her little sister. She constantly asks to hold her, help feed her, and I often find her laying next to her.


I remember people talking about how difficult it would be for Emily to suddenly adjust to having a new sibling and me having to share your attention but honestly, Emily has been fab. If anything it is me who is struggling a little bit, I'm dreading Sam going back to work - not because I won't cope as I know I will find my own little groove and I'll manage just fine. At the moment I have Sam for back up, there is two of us and two of them. If I'm feeding Isabelle, I can tell Emily to go to Sam or vice-versa. When he goes back to work, that won't be an option anymore, and I can't split myself in two. I miss being able to just cuddle or play with Emily whenever I want. I now have to try and make sure that both the girls are happy, which is no easy task. Especially when their needs are so different. While Emily is able to feed herself, get dressed without help, and is quite independent. Isabelle needs me to feed her, and change her - basically do everything.

That doesn't mean that Emily doesn't need me. The last thing I want is for her to feel pushed out or forgotten because it can easily happen especially when there is just one of me. I am making the most of the time that I have with Emily while Isabelle sleeps and I think that massively helps her, also the fact we have got her so involved in everything helps because rather than feeling like she is being pushed aside, she is happy to help us, and get bits and bobs I may need such as clean nappies. I guess I'm just going to take it as it comes, one day at a time.

Things were so different when Emily was a newborn. If I didn't get dressed, or go out that was fine as a newborn doesn't notice, but a toddler does. There is no way I can stay in all day, Emily will be climbing the walls. It does all sound a little daunting when I write it down, but I know I will be fine. I can do this, other Mama's do. I just need to find my own little groove and I will be fine, right?

Wish me luck - I'm sure I will be back to update you all on how my first day with the girls alone went.

9 comments

  1. You are doing amazingly so far, just try and take it a day at a time. Adjusting to two must be a big change so don't be too hard on yourself if you don't manage to make it outside the house every day xx

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  2. Like Emma said, take it a day at a time lovely. It does take a lot of getting used to but you can and will do it lovely <3

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  3. You are doing such a good job by the sounds of it. It must be such a big change going from one child to two. Don't be too hard on yourself with getting out and about though sometimes a day in watching a bit of tv can be a good thing.

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  4. It's so tough at the start, and even now when my daughter is 10 weeks old I'm still finding my feet somewhat but I'm much more confident.

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  5. Oh love, I completely get this! I was the same with H after he was born - you will get there, and it is blooming tough! Sending so much mumpathy! Be kind to yourself xxx

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  6. good luck when its just you - you'll settle into it quickly. I found that going from one to two was fairly straightforward as you're already getting up and about with a toddler, they just fit right in!

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  7. You are doing a brilliant job! It's a huge change going from one to two so don't put too much pressure on yourself, take each day at a time xxxx

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  8. You are doing amazing. It's such a big difference going from 1 to 2. I remember thinking the same thing about always actually having to get dressed when I didn't have to with 1. x

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  9. We have all been there. I was dreading the time hubby went back to work. Both turned out okay and they are the best of friends. J hardly bring them out together on my own though.

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